A Young Wife’s Tale

Autumn is my least favorite season. I’m sorry. I know a lot of you love the fall, but I’m a summer girl. All the delicious produce, the wakeboarding and barbecues…Sigh. I love summer. In middle school I hosted a funeral for summer. I’m not kidding. The Sunday before school started, I invited a unch of friends, family and neighbors over for a funeral. We buried a shoe box full of ticket stubs and pictures. A little summer time capsule. My little brothers did a cap gun salute. And then we all ate a bunch of fabulous summer food. It was a blast. And yeah, I throw parties for everything.

The next morning, I called the house and learned that he’d had an awful night. Well, he and my parents had an awful night. Brother #1 was in extreme pain and had starting swelling. They’d used lots of ice and he’d been taking the pain medicine as prescribed.

In the middle of the night, my father finally had to call the surgeon. The surgeon said that since Brother #1 is so young and athletic (He’s a personal trainer.) he was probably metabolizing the pain medicine too quickly. He instructed my parents to give Brother #1 the pain medicine every 3 hours instead of every 4-6 hours and to also give him Ibuprofen.

***Warning. Do not read this post if you need to have your wisdom teeth pulled!***

My surgery was scheduled for five o’clock in the afternoon. I wasn’t allowed to eat anything after mid-night the night before. I now know how ridiculous that is. Ten or twelve hours fasting would have been plenty. The surgery was performed in my regular dentist’s office.

As I walked back with the oral surgeon I asked him, “How do you become an oral surgeon? Do you become a dentist and then go to medical school?” His reply, “Well, I’m not actually an oral surgeon. I’m a dentist that specializes in extracting wisdom teeth.”

That’s right. He wasn’t an oral surgeon. He was going to knock me out, and he hadn’t even gone to medical school. Don’t worry, it gets worse.