Chronic illness and chronic pain really screw up your dating life. You can’t plan things in advance because you don’t know how you’ll feel next month. All your money is going to doctors, and you hurt so much you can’t do most active things.

David and I love to try new things. Often when we go out to eat, we look for restaurants we’ve never tried before. If there’s an exhibit or festival or a play in town, we love to go. We used to go to Mavs and Stars games. We used to go to the arboretum and indoor rock climbing. Once, David took me for a gondola ride here in Dallas.

These days it’s hard for us to find new things we can try. It’s really hard to have a romantic date. We can’t do anything that involves too much walking. The seats at sporting events are brutal when you can’t even sit in the movie theater for two and a half hours.

A few weeks ago we did go on a date to see a Christian Improv group. It was a lot of fun, and it was shorter than a movie. They also perform at a church near our home, so we didn’t have to drive far or walk much. And Saturday David was feeling pretty good so we went bowling. David hurt quite a lot during and afterwards, but it was kind of worth it for him.

I read about cheap date idea in a magazine. It said that each person should go in the dollar store and buy a few things for the other person. I bought David puzzle books (because I’ve seen him buy them for himself), batteries (because he has so many electronic devices) and Silly Putty. David bought me a girl’s surprise bag, that deoderizing powder you sprinkle on the carpet (because I’d been complaining about the smell Henry leaves on the carpet after he eats rawhide rolls) and Dark Chocolate Rasinettes.

We both agreed that this was a horrible date idea and that we obviously didn’t know each other as well as we thought we did. David said I didn’t get the right kinds of puzzle books. He has rechargable batteries. He liked the Silly Putty. The girl’s surprise bag was a bunch of junk. Surprise bags aren’t something I’d ever buy. I like knowing what I’m paying for. And carpet deoderizing powder? It’s so …practical, for a housewife like me.

And now I have a confession. I don’t like chocolate that much. I like it. Just not every day. I’d take a lemon bar, cookie, slice of cake or pie over chocolate any time. I do like Dark Chocolate Rasinettes. I do prefer dark chocolate over milk chocolate. It’s just that I’ve told David a million times, “I’m not a chocoholic!”

So won’t you please give us your favorite date ideas? Do you have any date ideas for people with chronic illness and very little money to spend?

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