A Young Wife’s Tale

When my husband and I were engaged, my mother told me, “I don’t care whether or not you go for pre-marital counseling. Nothing can prepare you for marriage.” She was right, but not even my mother knew the challenges my husband and I would face in our marriage.

On July 8, we celebrated five years of marriage. Those five years have been dominated by health problems. It started off with my health. I had severe TMJ Disorder and a knee injury. Then in our second year of marriage, my husband, David, was diagnosed with Psoriatic Arthritis. Although he was being treated, he continued to get worse until our third year of marriage when he began experiencing flares that left him bedridden for days at a time.

Four years ago today, David and I said our vows.

We completely ruined all other vacations with our honeymoon. We stayed at The Mansion on Turtle Creek and took a fabulous seven day cruise. Now any time we go anywhere, we’ll say, “Well, this is nice, but it’s not as nice as The Mansion.” We took a fun trip to a resort in Jamaica last year. We both agreed it was great, but not as great as our cruise.

David and I have communication problems like most married couples. I’ve learned that David does not volunteer any information. I must never assume anything. I have to ask him everything, sometimes more than once in order to get a straight answer. For instance, if I say, “Hey, do you want to go to a concert?” David will automatically respond, “Yeah, sure,” even if he has no interest in seeing a concert. He just thinks that I want him to say yes. If I say I like or want something, David thinks he needs to get it for me right now. It’s something we’ll be working on for the next fifty years or so.

Three years ago today, I married David. Gosh, it feels like a million years ago. In a good way. It just feels like we’ve been together forever.