Happy Fourth of July! Thank you to all the men and women who serve our country.
When I was a sophmore in college I took a speech class as a part of my degree plan. We covered a lot more than public speaking. My professor had us do presentations where we were “selling” products, and we had to create a resume. The biggest assignment we had for this class was all about whatever career we hoped to pursue. My major was culinary arts, but I decided to do my project on what I really wanted to be: a housewife and eventually a mother.
We had to interview someone we had never met that had our dream job. A good friend hooked me up with a friend of hers that was a stay at home mom. It was a wonderful interview. I wrote my paper and gave my presentation. I remember opening my speech with, “My major is culinary arts, but I don’t want to be a chef. I want to be a wife and mother. I don’t usually tell people that because of their negative reactions. People say things like “just” a stay at home mom…”
My professor and my class mates reacted really well to my project. My professor’s mother had been a SAHM, and he really loved and appreciated her. In my written copy of the speech he made some very interesting comments. He told me about his mother, and how his mother and father were about to celebrate fifty years of marriage. He wrote that he couldn’t imagine anyone saying anything negative to me about being a housewife or SAHM. “Perhaps these are your own fears about being a housewife?” he asked.
I did not know if this man was a believer, so I didn’t have the heart to tell him that the most awful things I’ve heard people say about women who are housewives came from people in church. Not working mothers. Not feminists. The church.
I remember one man who was married and had a child saying, “I would never want my wife to be just a mom.”
There was a grandmother who told her daughter she was wasting her degree* by staying at home with her children.
Doesn’t strike you as sad that my speech class and professor were more supportive of my desire to be a wife and mother than some of the people in the church? Most, if not all, of the Christians I know support women being housewives and full time mothers. Let’s just make sure we’re vocal about it.
A Young Wife
*For the record, education is NEVER wasted.
I understand your reaction about the church’s response to certain things. People in the church often scoff at me because I don’t want kids. They think that if I don’t want kids I shouldn’t get married. Of course, we all know the only reason to get married is to procreate. (Now what will they say when they find that a woman is married and can’t procreate…must be a sin problem.) Also, if a woman doesn’t like kids she clearly is evil. Very, very evil. So, go for it, Ash. Be a stay at home wife. Enjoy it. Working an 8-5 is boring and not so rewarding after all…
I was told by someone (that I don’t know that well) that I’m wasting my masters degree, because I’m at home now. Whatever. I’d rather “waste” that than lose time with my child!
I can’t wait to *waste* my degrees!
Totally, i am an african american woman and been denied opportunities growing up, being at home with my children(I am not married or with child) is absolutely unheard of..people died to be able to get an education and you want to do WHAT? yeah. Raise my children, that’s all…getting the degree was the easiest thing I have ever done..family..NOW that is a bear…