I’m living with an open bite. It’s not going to change any time soon. Here’s what it looks like when I bite down.

Only my back teeth touch. This means that my lips do not completely cover my teeth when my mouth is close, unless I sort of purse them.

This means I have white spots on my teeth in the morning from air hitting my teeth all night. It takes me eating breakfast, brushing my teeth and drinking a Diet Coke to get them to go away.

An open bite means eating sandwiches, burgers, corn on the cob and pizza is difficult and sometimes impossible. Eating in public is embarrassing.

Every dentist I see wants to put me back in orthodontics to correct this open bite. I am terrified of more orthodontics. As a child and teenager, I had two sets of braces. At sixteen, my teeth, alignment and bit were considered perfect. If I had orthodontics again, I could revert back to the level of jaw pain I was experiencing four years ago. I never want to go back to that. Even if I worked with an orthodontist that understood TMJ Disorder and everything went well and I didn’t experience a lot of jaw pain, I’d still have to pay to see my specialist a lot more. He’d have to change my night guard every time my mouth changed.

I told the TMJ Disorder specialist I’m seeing here in New Jersey that although having an open bite is frustrating, I’m scared to correct it. He agreed with me, saying correcting it might cause more harm than good. If I’m relatively pain free now, why worry about the open bite?

So, I’m accepting my open bite. I’m not going to worry about my jaw deformity any more. I will not look at pictures from five years ago and compare them to pictures today trying to see how much my face has changed.

If this is the way my jaw has to be for me to feel better, I’ll praise God I’m feeling better.

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• No Chewing Diet
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• Night Guard

His main goal on this trip was to eat a real Philly Cheesesteak. I was happy to oblige.

I squished mine down as much as I could, and was able to eat about half of it before my jaw gave out.

Speaking of my jaw, I met with my new TMJ Disorder specialist this week. I had hoped to see my specialist in Dallas whenever we went home. Unfortunately, he will be out of town the week we’re there. My Dallas specialist was able to recommend a colleague of his in Pennsylvania.

I wore a hole in my night guard, so I had to be seen soon. At least I didn’t bit this one in two, right? This specialist is an hour and half away, but he’s one of the few that doesn’t think surgery is the answer, so it’s worth the drive.

As stable as I am, I really hate to complain. I don’t even consider myself to be in pain. I feel some discomfort, but compared to how I was two years ago, I feel incredible.

The doctor did a thorough exam, and when he touched my occipital lobes (at the base of the skull) I winced, and told him it hurts to wear sunglasses. He said he was glad I was doing so well, but he thought he could adjust the night guard so I don’t even have that discomfort.

I’m so thankful for these amazing doctors!

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• 2nd Week in New Jersey
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• Status Update

Monday when David came home from work, he said, “I put in a request to go to a training conference in Virginia. It’s Wednesday through Friday. They’ll never approve it on such short notice.”

Tuesday afternoon, David calls me and says, “Pack my bag. I’m leaving in three hours.”

Seeing as we live so close to such a rough part of town, and I don’t know a single person here in New Jersey, I didn’t feel comfortable staying by myself for three days.

I tried to fly home to Dallas. I learned that flying with a pet is very difficult. It cannot be done on short notice. Henry would have to have seen a vet within 10 days of flying, and it seems that most flights (and all of the flights available to me) don’t even accept carriers over 28 inches long. Henry needs a carrier between 42-48 inches long. So I couldn’t take him with me.

When we were sneaking Henry into the hotel, I had tried to board him at Petsmart. We then discovered that our vet in Dallas didn’t tell us that Henry was way overdue for a Bordatella shot. Petsmart suggested a vet that also boards dogs. I called them, and they said that Henry would need to get the Bordatella shot two weeks before being boarded. So I couldn’t board Henry here and fly home.

I ended up driving to Virginia with Henry. David left on such short notice that he was making his own travel arrangements anyway, so we were able to stay in a pet friendly hotel.

If you follow me on Twitter, you might have seen me complaining about a domestic disturbance our neighbors were having. It was neighbors at our hotel. This lady was screaming obscenities and kicking her husband (or perhaps boyfriend) out because she missed her hair appointment. This was happening while I was in the hotel by myself and David was at the conference. So much for staying in a safer place. After twenty minutes, the guy left.

Later that afternoon he came back and the screaming started again. I called the front desk to report the disturbance and was told, “Oh, room 207? That’s a nice lady. She’s just arguing with her husband. They won’t bother you. Oh, and I’m not going to charge you the pet fees. I didn’t see your dog. It’s okay.”

Wow. Basically, they just didn’t want me to call the cops. I would have, had the fighting next door not stopped while I was on the phone with the front desk. It made me so mad. I mean, what if that fight had escalated? It was pretty bad. The man could have come back with a weapon to kill that crazy lady. I was trying to be a responsible citizen.

Anyway, David loved his training. He was very happy the company sent him. I got a good bit of reading done in the hotel. Virginia was very pretty. The weather was great, and we went to Bull Run one night. David and I had a really nice time on the drive back. We got in a lot of talking, and we had our Garmin, so we weren’t stressing about getting lost.

David is very happy in his new job. We should be finished unpacking this week, barring any unforeseen trips.

David’s arthritis has remained remarkably stable, praise God. After the crazy week we had, he wasn’t up to visiting church this Sunday. We were so looking forward to worshiping with other believers and meeting new friends, but we’ll just have to wait until next week.

The only major concern I have right now about David is his diet. David can’t have gluten, and he’s had gluten at least twice now while eating lunch with co-workers. Many people have dietary restrictions. What’s the big deal in saying, “I can’t eat pizza. I’ll just order something else.”

As for me, the appliance I wear at night for my TMJ Disorder is not right. I need to see my specialist back in Dallas for an adjustment, but that’s probably not going to happen any time soon. I’ve had a lot more jaw pain this week, and even some headaches. My gums are bleeding every morning when I wake up. Maybe when we find a chiropractor, he’ll be able to help some.

Thanks for keeping us in your prayers!

Love,
A Young Wife

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Here’s a list of foods you don’t have to chew. It’s handy for people like me with TMJ Disorder, and maybe it would help someone who’s recently had oral surgery. Remember, sucking smoothies through a straw strains the jaw muscles!

*Pudding
*Mashed Potatoes
*Egg Drop Soup
*Frozen Yogurt (Eat it with a spoon)
*Protein Shakes
*Slim Fast
*Custard
*Applesauce
*Yogurt
*Mashed Sweet Potatoes
*Oatmeal

A word of caution about soups. Most soups are great for people with jaw pain. However, if someone has recently had oral surgery, soups with chunks of anything are probably not a good idea. My brother had to be really careful after having his wisdom teeth removed. The surgeon said people have been getting tiny pieces of broccoli stuck in their sockets.

And, as with anything else, you should do whatever your doctor says. Sometimes after oral surgery, you’re not supposed to have anything extremely warm or extremely cold.

Hope that helps!

Love,
A Young Wife

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TMJ Disorder is a very broad diagnosis. Dr. Bender has actually diagnosed me more specifically with a sleep disorder and facial pain and some other medical jargon that I can’t remember now. For more information about TMJ Disorder, check out The TMJ Association website.

I’ve noticed recently that it’s becoming harder and harder to whistle. It’s not such a horrible thing. I don’t need to whistle. It’s just an example of how my jaw and mouth isn’t working properly. Also, I’ve been having trouble enunciating the past week or so. I’m sure it’s just because David has been in such bad shape, and I’m stressed. I just don’t want anyone to think I’m slurring my words ’cause I’m drunk.

Last week the chiropractor asked me how I was doing, and I asked him to fix my jaw so I could eat until I’m full instead of eating until my jaw gets tired. He did a big, painful adjustment on my jaw. It seemed to help.

I dread seeing the dentist next week. It’s very hard to keep my mouth open for a cleaning, let alone fillings. I had a good dentist who understood how painful everything is for me. I had to have four fillings (My last set of molars never came in all the way. They’re hard to reach and clean since I can’t open my mouth very wide.) last year, and so he split the work up into multiple visits so that I wouldn’t have to hold my mouth open for too long.

With our current health insurance, we do not get to select our own dentist. The new dentist actually asked me, “Why do you think you have TMJ Disorder?” After I explained my situation to him, he tried to sell me orthodonics to correct my open bite and “infantile swallow” which he said would cure me. I explained that I’ve had two sets of braces, a bite guard, multiple retainers and a recent consultation with an orthodonist who confirmed that it was not in fact anything orthodonically causing my TMJ Disorder.

I’ve talked a little about this before, but the dentist and hygienist always want to see my night guard and tell me what I should be doing. Sometimes they’ve given me advice contrary to what Dr. Bender says. It’s always annoying when people who have no idea what they’re talking about try to give you advice.

Which brings me to another topic about chronic invisible illnesses. Ask anyone with a chronic or invisible illness and they’ll tell you: We get LOTS of advice. Everyone sends you emails with a “cure” for your disease. First, it’s impossible to try every single remedy we hear about. Second, I’m not interested in your multi-level marketing scheme.

What helps me the most is when people listen and then say they’ll pray for David and me. Some advice is helpful. Like my mother-in-law telling me to call the pharmacy and ask them to print out a list of all the medication we’ve purchased this year for our medical expenses when we were filling out the financial assistance paperwork. I had no idea they would do that. It was an enormous help. Or friends who’ve suggested great vegetarian recipes to help David limit his animal protein intake. That’s advice I can actually use.

Honestly, I don’t need any information on cures and remedies. I’ve already done more research than you have, plus we talk to the doctors at least every eight weeks, and we belong to several groups that would certainly let us know if there was a cure or even just a new drug. I know people just want to help. I appreciate their efforts and we’re certainly not mad at anyone. But it’s getting to be the family joke that so and so called with the magical cure. And then the response is a quote from the movie Horton Hears a Who we learned from my sister-in-law, Kristy.

And in my world, everyone’s a pony that eats rainbows and poops butterflies!

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September 14-20 is National Invisible Chronic Illness Awareness Week. I’ll be blogging about it that week. Here’s a preview post.

The worst part about invisible illness, for me anyway, is that people forget. If you have a broken foot, people see the cast and remember. No one knows I have TMJ Disorder just by looking at me. When I’m eating in public, I feel like I should wear a sign: My momma raised me right. I’m trying to chew with my mouth closed but my jaw doesn’t work properly.

Chewing gum is absolutely forbidden when you have jaw trouble. Yet, even close family members still offer me gum, and I’ve had TMJ Disorder for five years.

My husband, David, has severe Psoriatic Arthritis. Folks look at him and see a healthy young man. People that know David well forget how bad he’s hurting because he doesn’t use a cane or a wheel chair.

One example in particular sticks out in my mind of how easily we forget about people with invisible illness. David and I both see several of the same doctors. One day, I saw one of our mutual doctors who had just seen David a few moments before. He was asking me how my day had been, and I mentioned my mother, mother-in-law, and I had trimmed the trees in my front yard. The doctor said, “Hey, be careful. David’s going to be upset you’re doing his job!”

Oh, how quickly we forget.

Even I forget sometimes and ask David to move a piece of furniture. Or, someone will invite us to do something like attend a Mavericks game, and I accept the invitation, only to realize later that there’s no way my husband can handle that much walking, let alone sitting in a hard metal chair for hours.

I always feel so guilty when I forget. David is bedridden at times. How could I forget he has a chronic illness like arthritis? How could I suggest he wakeboard a few months after a weekend of having to dress him?

People forget. God does not.

Isaiah 44:21 (NIV)
“Remember these things, O Jacob, for you are my servant, O Israel. I have made you, you are my servant; O Israel, I will not forget you.

Isaiah 49:15 (NIV)
“Can a mother forget the baby at her breast and have no compassion on the child she has borne? Though she may forget, I will not forget you!

We are so blessed that God is not only omniscient, but God actually cares about his children’s troubles.

It’s okay if you forget that I have TMJ Disorder or David has arthritis. But please, try to be kind and considerate to everyone. You never know what they’re going through or what invisible illness they may have.

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• TMJ Disorder
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Dr. Bender and his staff were thrilled that I made it to my regular appointment. They were even more excited when Dr. Bender examined my night guard and proclaimed, “There’s not much damage here, considering it’s you.” Hallelujah! Thank you, God!

I’ll never be cured of TMJ Disorder. There is no way to prevent me from clenching and grinding my teeth during the night. However, I am so blessed to be able to say that I am now stable. I feel it’s safe to say my jaw is okay. The past few weeks, I knew it was time to see Dr. Bender. I’ve had some tightness and discomfort, but that’s exactly it. Discomfort. I wouldn’t even call it pain.

It went downhill from there. I went to Wal-Mart, and totally blew my grocery budget. I don’t think I’ve ever done that. Then, when I started my Explorer, it kind of felt funny. I was almost out of gas, and sometimes the Explorer has a hard time starting when it’s low on gas, especially if it’s on any sort of incline. So, I left Wal-Mart, got on the freeway and headed home.

Once I hit the exit ramp, the car started shaking really bad. The back door has a terrible habit of not closing all the way, and I thought that the exit had knocked it open. It felt like maybe the speed and wind were dragging it. So, I’m on the exit ramp. I pull over to the right shoulder. I get out and slam the back door hard. I get back in and pull forward five feet and realize it wasn’t the door. I could smell rubber.

The rear passenger tire had blown out. Duh. How I failed to notice this when I walked to the back of the vehicle is beyond me. I called David. His office is nearby, and so he got there quickly. He pulled out the jack and started to get to work, but the jack wouldn’t go low enough for him to get it under the car. He called his father, the previous owner of the vehicle, and asked him if there was a trick. David’s father didn’t know what the deal was, so I called roadside assistance.

I was very thankful. The blowout could have been so much worse. Praise God it didn’t happen on the freeway. I didn’t wreck the car. I wasn’t hurt. David was nearby.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch, David’s father called David’s mother, who was with David’s sisters. David’s sisters are married to wonderful men who happen to work near David’s office, so two of David’s brothers-in-law came to us with a jack and helped us get the spare on, while I called and canceled roadside assistance. Got that, or do I need to draw a family tree?

Poor David was sweaty and his clothes were all greasy. It was a 102 degrees today here in Dallas. I didn’t have anything to pull my hair back with, so I used the ear buds cord from my Ipod.

Once the spare was on, he followed me to a gas station where we filled the spare with some more air, and I filled up on gas. We got home and David changed clothes. We also ate lunch. It was 2:30. Then we took the Explorer to NTB and got a new tire.

I wish I had had a camera with me to take a picture of the tire and the guys working on the car, but I didn’t. I’m just grateful I wasn’t hurt, and I didn’t hurt anyone else.

We’ll see if David is miserable tomorrow…

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There are a lot of all natural products out there that claim to work wonders. But herbal remedies have side effects just like drugs. You should always check with your doctor and pharmacist to make sure these “natural” products, supplements and vitamins aren’t interfering with other medications or aggravating your blood pressure or something.

Alternative medicine is great. Why pop pills if you don’t have to? If I’m sick and I can get over it without taking an anti-biotic, I absolutely will. The more you can let your body take care of itself, the better, I think. Vitamins don’t seem to help me at all, but I’ve noticed that eating yogurt a few times a week keeps me much healthier.

It’s common sense, but I think that a healthy diet with a wide variety of foods and exercise will cure and prevent a lot of our nation’s top illnesses such as heart disease and diabetes. However, some illnesses are genetic and they are not helped by any diet or exercise. Like David’s arthritis.

I’m also a proponent of “minimally invasive”. You know, there are three ways to treat, X and Y is the most minimally invasive treatment. I’ll do Y first and see if that works. When I had severe jaw pain, I refused to see an oral surgeon, the specialist everyone kept recommending. Because he was an oral surgeon, he was going to tell me I needed surgery. And I wasn’t willing to have surgery.

By the way, why is it that insurance companies will cover oral surgery for TMJ Disorder, but not the treatment I get where Dr. Bender just makes adjustments to the night guard I wear at night? Surgery is a lot more expensive. I think it’s because people are uneducated.

Which leads me to my last point. Education. Get lots of education from several different sources and don’t believe everything you read or hear. You should even take this blog post with a grain of salt. I’m not a doctor. Yogurt could be killing me slowly.

Hi, I’m A Young Wife. I’m a fan of alternative medicine. I’m also a fan of traditional medicine. How about you? Do you swear by orange juice for colds? Baking soda baths for chiggers? Do you see a chiropractor or acupuncturist?

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• Yesterday

Me wearing my night guard

The last night guard I had was called an NTI. It was a little piece of plastic that sat on the two middle teeth in the bottom of my mouth. It kept my back teeth from touching while I was wearing it.

Here’s another picture that may give you a better view.

Mouth full of plastic. Expensive plastic.

Poor David. This is what he sleeps next to!

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